Ten Years of City of Bones: Week Six (Who Are You, Really?)

4:00 PM

*Sniffles* This meme is officially over half way done and I'm totally not ready to say goodbye. They all just grow up so fast *blows into tissue* don't they? It's not to late to join in on the fun--if you're a fan of The Shadowhunter Chronicles by Cassandra Clare, you can join in on our weekly celebration at any time you want. It could literally be 2027 and you could join in. To learn more about it, click here.

This weeks theme is the age old question: WHO THE FRICKITY FRACK AM I? Or, rather, who would I be in the pages--ahem, the world--we've come to know and love. Which, to be honest, sent me into a bit of an identity crisis! Who am I? What will I become? What characters would have a restraining order against me IRL?

Yes, yes, yes. I know what you're thinking, "Jessica. Didn't you, like, so totally write the questions for this meme? Shouldn't you have made it easier on yourself?" the answer is yes, I did. But where would the fun be in the easy route? Is it really a day if I haven't spun myself around in about forty different circles?

I'm not sure. Probably not. Sounds pretty fake to me. #ALTERNATIVEFACTS

And now... without further ado...

Part of me wanted to be a smart ass when identifying this BRAND NEW (!!!!!) fictional version of myself and say, "I'd be a demonic rubber duck!" or even "Who, me? Why, that's rather simple. A very drunken version of Chairman Meow. I am Meow, only stronger." but then I decided to play nice. I briefly considered saying Shadowhunter because... how cool is that!

But then I remembered I once had a spider in my bedroom, at some point in high school, and was afraid to move so I called the house phone from my cellphone to have my mom come kill it for me. She certainly wasn't pleased with me, but that's besides the point. My point is: I'M A WIMP. I'm not joking. Look up, "TOTAL WEAKLING, LOSER WIMP"* in the dictionary and my picture is right next to it.

*You can also find me under, "Coffee addict", "Impulsive Makeup Buyer" and "Extra"--if you were wondering.

And then I just sort of started going down the line: I am not an Angel. Not because I'm, like, demonic or anything but because well, have you met me? No? Fair enough--but it's pretty self explanatory on the why's.

So that leaves us with (1) Warlock. (2) Vampire. (3) Werewolf. (4) Mundane. (5) Ghost.

Vampire is a no-go. I cannot stand the sight of blood (like, at all) and I'm a vegetarian so it's just a massive failure circle all around. To be honest, I'd be that vampire who accidentally killed someone and then became Super Sad Vampire and nobody wants a Super Sad Vampire around so the vampires, in turn, would kill me. Again.

Where would the fun be in that? I rather like being alive. Or undead. Whatever.

And because of the simple fact that I am far too keen on being alive, being a ghost is a no-go for me. Unless that ghost happens to be one of The Groovie Goolies. Which, in that case, I may consider it just so I can be part of Sabrina Spellman's Squad. I'm getting off track. Wrong verse, Jessica.

Werewolves seem great and everything--plus, the chance to hang with Maia Roberts? Wicked. I dig it. But the whole... you know... wolfing out thing isn't my thing. Like, can I just have a moment to breathe and not spontaneously become an animal? I'd get fur all over my new dress and I really don't feel like that. Do you know how much it would cost to keep myself in those lint rollers for the rest of my life? I could be spending my money on ALL THE COFFEE and frankly, that's where it's all at.

Which leaves us with... WARLOCK! Did you guys really think I wouldn't pick this in the end? Let's be real, in this fantasy... magic and me are total endgame material. Fuck the romance if I can shoot sparks from my fingertips. I would basically be the Vodka Aunt Equivalent of Warlocks and it would be pretty... actually, I might still get myself killed. You just never know. I am me, after-all.

But, honestly. How wonderful would it be to have magic stored somewhere inside of you? All that power just tucked away for all of time. Not to sound like a cheesy old white lady, but that shit would be breathtaking. And while I wouldn't be terribly excited about the prospect of watching everyone I know who was mortal die, it would still be...

Well. Magical.  

Plus, there's something utterly appealing to two things: (1) TESSA GRAY (2) MAGNUS BANE so like, where do I sign up? 

That's all for this week! If you could be anything in the Shadowhunter Chronicles, or your favourite fantasy novels, what would you be? 

Until next time! 

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